Category Archives: The Chief Justice Hollywood

The Homage Show on ESPN

Although I rarely talk about it on the show, I’m a big fan of college basketball.  I could talk to you for hours about college hoops.  One proposal that I support is to reduce the shot clock from 35 seconds to 24 seconds.  I think that it would make the game more fluid and entertaining.  It would also help reduce all those fouls on purpose at the end of the game that are so boring.

Well, this week I was happy to see ESPN writer Eamonn Brennan argue for the same thing.  But I noticed that he left out the part about the fouls at the end of games.  So I sent him an e-mail about it and he featured it on the ESPN website!  Thanks Eamonn!

Here is the article.  It’s The Homage Show’s ESPN debut!

C.J. Hollywood

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to!  Last week the website turned 1 year old!  And since it’s not a human, it doesn’t mind if I say ‘happy birthday’ a week late (unlike some people).

Thanks to everyone who has visited the website during the first year.  We’ve had a great time doing the show and I hope this next year will bring even more great entertainment and maybe even a new feature or two.  Be sure to visit often and get homaginized anytime!

The Chief Justice Hollywood

Special Thanks to the Pet Shop Boys

I would like to give a special thank you to the Pet Shop Boys.  On April 21, 2012, I featured them as the Artiste of the Week and the following day, their website put up a link to my episode.

It is a true honor for one of my favorite artists to recognize my show and to give their fans around the world the chance to experience it.  On behalf of myself and everyone associated with The Homage Show, you have our sincere gratitude.

The Chief Justice Hollywood

Microwavable Pancakes

Recently I embarked on a challenge to eat some microwavable pancakes with blueberry filling.  Challenge you say?  What’s so challenging about eating frozen pancakes?  Well first there were the directions.  It gave the microwave times for heating one pancake, two pancakes, or four pancakes.  That’s great except that the package contained three pancakes!  This is just my guess, but wouldn’t you think that three pancakes would probably be the most popular serving size?  And how did they arrive at four?  I guess you would have to buy two packages, open both and then remove just one pancake from the second package and heat it along with the three from the first package.  Not impossible I suppose, but I’m guessing that most people don’t eat their pancakes that way.

Ok, so I got my pancakes heated (after guessing on the time) and set on the table and went to get a drink.  Unfortunately, when I returned a minute later, I discovered a cat standing over the pancakes, licking the blueberry filling.  A lesser man might have given up at this point, but not I.  After removing the cat, and picking off a few hairs, I finally got to try the pancakes and discover that they really weren’t that good after all.  Oh well, at least I had potato salad as a backup plan.

The Chief Justice Hollywood

Camera Angles

I’ve been watching the NCAA basketball tournament and their close-up shots of players and coaches on the bench keep making me laugh.  Why?  Because it seems like every time the camera zooms to someone sitting on the bench, some other person decides to step right in front of that person.  The end result is about a three second close-up of somebody’s crotch or rear end.  Only in sports are you allowed to get away with zooming in on people’s private areas.  If you tried doing that in any other form of live tv, you would get fired and charged with voyeurism.

The Chief Justice Hollywood

Game of Scrabble

I recently played Scrabble for the first time in a long time.  On the bright side, I was able to play the words N-E-A-T and S-T-O-O-L back to back (and I made sure to point that out to everyone just in case they didn’t notice).  But on the down side, there was one point when my seven letters were H-I-S-P-A-N-I and there was no C on the board that I could use.  Aaaarrrgh!  I was that close to shocking everyone with an amazing eight letter word that some might consider to be politically incorrect, but alas it was not to be.

The Chief Justice Hollywood

Everyone Thinks I’m French

or at least French-Canadian.  When I took my trip to Canada for a few days, I was in an English-speaking part of Canada, but I was close enough to the areas where French is common so that everything was bilingual (signs, directions, etc).

The interesting thing is that various workers and empolyees have to pick English or French when they initially address customers.  And wouldn’t you know it, every time I approached them, they greeted me with a “Bonjour.”  This was despite the fact that their conversations with the customers ahead of me had been entirely in English.

Every time I would respond with “Hello” and the conversation would switch to English from there.  But there was one guy who continued to use French anyway.  Either he didn’t speak English, or despite my use of English, he was absolutely convinced that I must really be French-Canadian.  Now I’m left wondering what it is about my appearance that makes everyone think I am French-Canadian.

The Chief Justice Hollywood

Football Game

Having attended many college football games, including one last week, I am convinced that no matter where I sit, there are always at least three people around me who fit into the following categories:  Loudmouth, Sick, and Wrong.

1. Loudmouth – the guy who’s really passionate about the game; who can’t stop yelling insults at the other team.  He reminds the other team’s quarterback about how terrible he is after every play.  Opposing coaches, kickers, players with funny names on their jerseys, you name it, Loudmouth will insult them any way he can as long as he can see them, because obviously if you can see them they must be able to hear you.

2.  Sick – the guy who happened to catch a cold the day (or week) before the game and it just might have evolved into something more serious.  Whatever the case, the hacking and coughing that erupts at any given second becomes your soundtrack for the game.  Meanwhile, you can practically feel the spittle raining down on the back of your head as you shudder to think about how many different combinations of bacteria and viruses will have their own football game inside you the next morning.

3.  Wrong – the guy who has to inform everyone else what’s going on all the time.  It’s like having your own announcer, except absolutely no qualifications are required.  What’s that?  We just rushed for 5 yards (it was 1 yard).  We’re going to have to punt (we’re in the red zone).  We really need Player X to step up in the second half (Player X had major knee surgery two weeks ago).  That’s all well and good until he starts giving you advice for your personal life.

I don’t know if this happens to just me or if everyone has to deal with this, but as long as I’ve been going to football games, this trio has plagued my existence.

The Chief Justice Hollywood

Justice Meeting

I recently spoke on the phone with a Justice of the Arkansas Supreme Court (which is not something that usually happens to me).  He called to commend me on creating such an outstanding radio program and tell me that he listens every week.  Ok, so I made that part up.  He actually called to talk to someone else.  But in those few moments before I gave the phone to someone else, I had the pleasure of speaking to a State Supreme Court Justice.  And he had the pleasure of speaking to The Chief Justice Hollywood.

Back to School

This is the time of year where students all over the country get to experience the confusion and awkwardness of trying to be in the right place at the right time for their class schedule.  I got a taste of it at my university.

I sat down and waited for class to start on the first day.  Then a guy came and sat down beside me.  He asked me my name and where I was from.  Then I asked him.  He answered that he was from Bolivia.  Then he told me that Bolivia is in South America (which I already knew, but I guess he wanted to make sure).  Then the professor walked in and started talking, at which point he realized that he was in the wrong class and got up and left.

Ahhhh, the first day of class.  You never know who will come into your life…or how quickly they will exit.

The Chief Justice Hollywood